I am a Year 6 student at Edmund Hillary School in Auckland, NZ. I am in Room 9 and my teacher is Roya. This is a place where I will share my learning. Please note that some of it will not be complete, it will be my first draft. Remember to be positive, thoughtful and helpful when you leave me a comment.
Kia ora Neha, thank you for sharing your poem. I like how you used rhyme, alliteration and a simile to share the downsides of having a cat. It would have been lovely to see your face in your video!
Tena koe Neha, this is Ruqayat your classmate. I really love your slam poetry. It has really good rhymes and alliteration. I also like how you put your opinion at the end of the poem. I just suggest that you put your face in the video. If you did that would make your poem even better. kind regards Ruqayat.
Hello Neha, This is Tiannah I dote your slam poetry, and I relish how you used rhyme and alliteration. It's absolutely astonishing, but the only thing I don't relish is people verbalizing in the background. Hopefully next time endeavor find a good place to do your screencastify so it can be PAWFECT! :)
Hello Neha this is Priththika your classmate your poem is very instresing. I like how you used Rhyme in your poem it's on point! it's incredibly Awesome! it sounds great!. What I don't like about your poem is that I can hear people talking in the background even tho your voice is clear the background isn't clear. hopefully next time you make a video of you reading out your poem. you can record outside! Also maybe you could have said the title that would have make it a bit better but I like it the way it is the poem is outstanding!.
Please structure your comments as follows: Positive - Something done well Thoughtful - A sentence to let us know you actually read/watched or listened to what they had to say Helpful - Give some ideas for next time or ask a question you want to know more about
Hello Neha, This is Mahana and i am your classmate i really like your slam poetry it is really good but i don't like the backround of your video
ReplyDeleteKia ora Neha, thank you for sharing your poem. I like how you used rhyme, alliteration and a simile to share the downsides of having a cat. It would have been lovely to see your face in your video!
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteTena koe Neha, this is Ruqayat your classmate. I really love your slam poetry. It has really good rhymes and alliteration. I also like how you put your opinion at the end of the poem. I just suggest that you put your face in the video. If you did that would make your poem even better. kind regards Ruqayat.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteHello Neha, This is Tiannah
ReplyDeleteI dote your slam poetry,
and I relish how you used rhyme and alliteration.
It's absolutely astonishing, but the only thing I don't relish is
people verbalizing in the background. Hopefully next time endeavor find
a good place to do your screencastify
so it can be PAWFECT! :)
Hello Neha this is Priththika your classmate your poem is very instresing. I like how you used Rhyme in your poem it's on point! it's incredibly Awesome! it sounds great!. What I don't like about your poem is that I can hear people talking in the background even tho your voice is clear the background isn't clear. hopefully next time you make a video of you reading out your poem. you can record outside! Also maybe you could have said the title that would have make it a bit better but I like it the way it is the poem is outstanding!.
ReplyDelete