I am a Year 6 student at Edmund Hillary School in Auckland, NZ. I am in Room 9 and my teacher is Roya. This is a place where I will share my learning. Please note that some of it will not be complete, it will be my first draft. Remember to be positive, thoughtful and helpful when you leave me a comment.
Kia ora Neha, thank you for sharing your descriptive writing. I like how you connected the picture to a complex idea by using the poppies as a simile for the soldiers. I would love to see more descriptive language from you - remember that the focus is on using adjectives, figurative language and your senses to show what you can see in the picture.
Please structure your comments as follows: Positive - Something done well Thoughtful - A sentence to let us know you actually read/watched or listened to what they had to say Helpful - Give some ideas for next time or ask a question you want to know more about
Kia ora Neha, thank you for sharing your descriptive writing. I like how you connected the picture to a complex idea by using the poppies as a simile for the soldiers. I would love to see more descriptive language from you - remember that the focus is on using adjectives, figurative language and your senses to show what you can see in the picture.
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